Miracles do happen...
Thursday, October 09, 2008

How to Ruin a Carpet:
  1. Leave a red Sharpie out.
  2. Take your eyes off the baby for a moment.

How to Save a Carpet:
Search the house for the bottle of rubbing alcohol you just bought. Give up and go to the dollar store, but not before finding a roll of paper towels.

Contemplate stopping for a different kind of alcohol, to make the red marker + rental house = loss of deposit equation less painful. Remember it is a weeknight, you don't drink, and you're knocked up anyway and just drive home.

Search the house for your spray bottle. Dig it out from under the girl's bed.

Mix up a concoction of half alcohol, half water.

Contemplate testing spray on hidden area. Decide that the carpet's already ruined, so just jump right in. Spray and blot. Blot and rub. Spray. Blot.

Repeat 416 times for the next hour, while the family eats dinner. Use the whole roll of paper towels.

Now the carpet has a light pink smear. It looks like the spray did bleach the carpet, but relax. You just cleaned the filth off of one spot, and that's why it's 7 shades lighter.

Spray with carpet spray.

beg plead cry Convince your husband to break out the carpet cleaning machine. Announce you are going to bed when he's only halfway through, because you're mean like that.

Wake up to a fresh, spot free rug!

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posted by Milehimama @ Mama Says at 10/09/2008 10:19:00 AM | Permalink | |