Our car is messed up, in the weirdest possible way, and we have no idea what's wrong. Two mechanics (okay, they're relatives consulted by phone) were mystified.

We have a 2001 Dodge Grand Caravan. It's very, very well used. A couple of years ago, we had some problems with the turn signals - I'd flip it to blink on the right, and the left blinker would come on, or the hazard lights would blink, or the radio station would click off. We didn't have the money to fix it at the time, and the problem went away, so I pretty much forgot about it.

A couple of years went by with no problems (except for the AC, but that's another story!).

A few months ago, we started having weird problems again - and it seemed to be electrical. I'd be driving down the road, and all of the sudden the odometer would start spinning and all the dash lights would come on; sometimes the air bag light wouldn't shut off, sometimes the radio would fade out when the windshield wipers actuated.

Husband dear poked around a bit (he's not a mechanic, but he is handy and has a Chilton's) and noticed that the battery was dry. Filling it didn't help, but a quick trip to Advanced AutoParts (and a hookup to their free battery computer doohickey thingie) diagnosed a dead battery, and sound alternator. We replaced the battery, and the problems went away.

This weekend, Houston got a lot of rain. And when we turned the wipers on - the car slips out of gear! (It's an automatic transmission). We also have the same problem with the odometer spinning around, the dash lights coming on and off, and it claims all of the gears are selected. Strangely, if we turn the headlights on, it sometimes rights itself and behaves. But if the wipers actuate again, all bets are off.

It's a little bit of an Exorcist moment, being on the highway and watching the odometer cycle around and around, or being in park and watching it read 120 mph.

Husband dear took apart the steering column to see if a wire was melted or arcing, but it looks fine. He traced the wires from the windshield, and the wires leading to the transaxle (Chilton's calls it a transaxle, not a transmission), and they all looked sound. That's about as far as he can go with it.

We consulted Christian Brothers Automotive, highly recommended by my sister, but they say it could take 3-4 hours on the diagnostic computer to figure it out - at $95 an hour!

So... anyone have any idea what it could be? (A helpful friend said it's probably a vacuum tube, whatever that means) or any recommendations for a reliable, trustworthy mechanic in North Houston that won't charge $400 just to tell us what might be wrong?

...or, does anyone in town have a 12 passenger van for sale, cheap?

Labels: Family Life, Frugal, Rants and Raves